Bonefish Grill – Pensacola, FL

While on vacation in December, my wife and I had the opportunity to have dinner with her sisters and their husbands (without kids!) at the Bonefish Grill in Pensacola, FL.  I had heard so many good things about this place that I was eager to dine there.  We had a great time together.  The six of us had not been together since our wedding in 2004, so this vacation was a family reunion of sorts.

When on vacation, one of the “rules” that we have is that we cannot eat at a restaurant that we have back home.  If we choose to eat out, then we want to experience some of the local food rather than a big chain restaurant that we can eat at in MN.

Bonefish Grill is definitely a go-to place.  We got there a bit after 5:00 and the parking lot was starting to fill up.  We tried some of the Bang-Bang Shrimp.  They were wonderful. A bit spicy with a kick, but I have never been known to shy away from the spicy food items!  For my main entree I had the Jumbo Sea Scallops and Shrimp.  They were more than likely fresh because of the proximity to the Gulf.  Something unique is that they offer signature sauces with each of their entrees:  Warm Mango Salsa, Chimichurri Sauce (which is more Italian), Lemon Butter and Pan Asian.  I tried the Chimichurri Sauce which was outstanding.  My wife was undecided when it came to the signature sauce for her entree, so our server brought her out a sample of each!  This was great because I got to try the Mango Salsa, but the Pan Asian was the best sauce by far.  I enjoyed my choice, but when I go back, the Pan Asian sauce is for me.

If you are looking for a nice place to enjoy great company and great food and service.  Bonefish Grill is definitely a place worth trying!

It just hit me…. 20 years

While having a conversation with my dad yesterday, I realized that I have been working full-time for 20 years!  If I had stayed with the same company (which is probably a rare thing to do in this day of uncertainty, unemployment, and mergers, etc.) I would have been there for 20 years.  I am thankful that I have had a relatively stable work history.  I started working full-time in 1991 just before I graduated from college.  I stayed with that company until 1999, surviving two acquisitions and managing to keep my job both times.  In 1999, I went to work for an independent Baptist mission agency in Jacksonville, FL.  I stayed there until 2002 when I moved to MN to attend seminary.  I was unemployed from August to October of 2002 and have worked for the same company since October in 2002 in two different capacities.  I have done the unenviable job of business to business collections (both in person and over the phone) Not my idea of a great job, but it paid the bills while in seminary, when I got married and when we had our first child.  Shortly before my son’s first birthday, I changed roles within this company and now I have a somewhat less stressful job in the Financial Operations area dealing with manufacturer rebate contracts.  It is an okay job, the pay is not competitive for this area, but the benefits are outstanding!

I am still looking for ministry opportunities, but there are not many to be had these days.  In the meantime, I am trying to find something that pays better because we are expecting our second child in August and we found out that God will grace us a with a little girl!  We have not decided on names yet, but I have stated that I would like to give her my mother’s first name as her middle name in honor of my mother who passed away in 2006.

April is a birthday month for our family.  My sister-in-law celebrates her birthday today (2nd), then my dad and sister share the same birthday on the 10th and then I am three days later (13th) and my son is on the 20th and one of my nephews is the 23rd.

Turning 40 did not bother me, but now that I am turning 42, it is starting to bother me a bit because I have been looking at my life and what I have accomplished and what still remains to be done.  I can remember when I was fresh out of college and full of zeal and ready to get busy for God and yet I was told that I could not expect to be hired by any church because of a few things:  1) I was young (23 at the time) 2) I did not have any experience  3) I was not married.

Now almost 20 years later, I am now looked on as being old (even at 42) still no formal church experience (being paid and having a title), but I am married and a father.

I also heard about one of my seminary  colleagues who is getting ready to go into full-time ministry upon his graduation in May, he already has a place to go!  I am glad that he will not have to experience what I have over this last year of rejections and lack of interest on the part of many churches/pastors.

Lord willing, the next 20 years of working will hopefully be more fruitful than this first 20!

My thoughtful son

I am a creature of habit…. it must be the perfectionist tendency that I possess. Everyday when I get home from work, I put my keys, wallet, and work ID badge in the same place, so that I do not forget them or lose them.  Friday was no different, I hung my badge up when I got home and did not think twice about it, until I was getting ready for church on Sunday afternoon (I had a early meeting prior to the evening service) when I noticed the empty lanyard without a badge.  I knew I had it when I came home, but did not have time to go on an exhaustive search for it.  I let my wife know that my badge was missing and that I would look for it later that evening.

As I was driving to church, I was attempting to re-trace my steps from Friday and at the same time I was praying that I did not drop my badge between the parking lot and my apartment.

I did not think about it anymore until I returned home later than evening and my son told me that he saw my badge hanging precariously from the lanyard and he did not want me to lose it, so he took the badge and placed it in my drawer.  That was very thoughtful of him and I thanked him for doing that!

If I had indeed lost the badge… it would have cost me $$ to replace it, been a hassle to get in each morning at work until it was replaced. It would have been a major inconvenience.  Thanks to my son Joseph for his thoughtfulness and looking out for his dad!

History does repeat itself

I was reminded of this disputed fact earlier this week, when I encountered some former seminary colleagues and their inquiries as to what I am doing now. It reminded me of when I graduated from college in 1992 (that seems so long ago – almost 20 years ago).   When I graduated from college, I was ready to head into ministry, after all, I had just finished Bible college and earned a B.A. degree in Church Ministries.  However, the following things were not in my favor at the time:  I was 23 years old, single, and had no formal ministry experience.  The economy was bad all over (like it is now) I had a decent secular job, but my heart was not there at all.  I sent my resume everywhere I knew that an opportunity existed that would possibly suit me.  Nothing happened for six long years. I was active in my local church, not real good in the dating arena from 1992 onward.  I was living in frustration because I felt like there was something wrong with me because I was watching my college friends and colleagues leave Jacksonville for ministry positions and opportunities.  The brief stint that I did have in full-time ministry (1998-2002)was a real eye-opener for me (it was not in a local church ministry, but a para-church organization) and it was some of those experiences and the hypocrisy that I saw that God used to get me to leave the dysfunctional situation and resume my education after a ten year hiatus.  So in 2002, I resigned my position and headed north for the Twin Cities to begin my academic career towards a MDiv. degree at Central Baptist Theological Seminary in Plymouth, MN.

Little did I know when I arrived in the Twin Cities how things would change in my life.  I started seminary in the Fall of 2002.  I could not find a job right away (It took 2 months to find a job and I am still with the same company almost 9 years later, but in a different role) I met my future spouse in 2002 and we were married in 2004, while I was still in pursuit of the MDiv degree.  In 2006, our first child was born, Joseph.  We lost his twin brother (earlier) and my mother passed away in September of 2006.  I thought that the convergence of these circumstances would push me to the breaking point and that I would quit seminary.  God was faithful and used several people to encourage me not to quit. As a result, I dropped back into the M.A program and finished the M.A in May of 2008 and then set out to finish the MDiv. which God allowed me to do in May 2010.  I applied to attempt to continue my education but was not accepted for post-graduate work.

Earlier this week, when I was talking with people and they were inquiring about my status (ministerially speaking) and I told them that I had sent out 15 resumes last year and no interviews.  Answering these questions, brought me back almost 20 years ago when I was answering the same questions to college colleagues who came back to the Jacksonville area and I would run into them at Trinity Baptist Church /College functions.

I did not realize how discouraged I had become until I started answering those questions on Monday morning.  By the time I came home on Monday afternoon, I was ready to crawl under a rock.  I asked the usual questions, Why me?  What did I do wrong?  It is also tough because I do not have a mentor or an advocate like so many younger guys have these days.  I could mention instances where guys have gotten their “foot in the door” and eventually obtained a position because of who they were associated with (mentor) or who they worked for or someone who was willing to “go to bat for them.”  I do not have anyone like that.  I thought if I had been accepted to post-graduate studies that kind of a Paul/Timothy relationship would have been fleshed out.  The reason I thought this is because I have heard about these types of relationships from my seminary professors with their mentors and have seen it in the lives of other ThM and PhD students at other institutions.

Now instead of being 23, I am 41 on the verge of being 42, I am married now (7 years in July) and I have one son (Joseph), one in heaven (Jonathan) and a son or daughter due in August. Now instead of being too young and inexperienced, now I am older and married and still do not have any formal experience (most churches do not take into consideration my extensive experience serving in three Baptist churches as a volunteer faithfully since 1987, they want to see that I had a title and/or a paycheck for what I have done and they have come up with the five years of experience as some form of benchmark of success or competency.  I recently saw one church was looking for a pastor that had a minimum of ten years experience!)

Even though time has marched on and now I have three ministry degrees, the pain is still present when I have to answer these types of questions.  20 years ago, Facebook and Twitter did not exist.  Some of the discouragement comes from seeing what others are doing and they are landing some great opportunities to serve God.   The pain is compounded when I returned to the secular  job where I have served honorably for the last eight years, but get no recognition, no career development and the compensation is lacking (when you are the main breadwinner) in an area where the cost of living is high in contrast to the salary that is below the per capita salary for our area.  Then you watch people get promoted who have been with the company less time than I have and with less education.  That does not help.  It would be one thing if I was radically succeeding in the secular workforce and making enough to support my family adequately, but that is not the case.  It feels like a grand failure on both fronts (secular and ministerial).

Charles Spurgeon talked about depression, “Fits of depression come over the most of us. Cheerful as we may be, we must at intervals be cast down. The strong are not always vigorous, the wise not always ready, the brave not always courageous, and the joyous not always happy.”

I am hoping at this point that I will not have to wait another six years before going into full-time ministry, but that is not for me to decide.

A quick look back at 2010

Well, I am sitting here at my desk and it has just started to sleet here in MN which will eventually turn over to freezing rain and then snow, I thought that I would do a quick “year in review” post.

January – seminary resumed

March – I took the GRE exam, seminary Spring Banquet, preached at Rock Falls Baptist Church in Mondovi, WI and Harvest Baptist Church in Redwood Falls, MN

April – Oral doctrinal defense before the faculty of CBTS; celebrated my 41st birthday and my son’s 4th birthday.  I also preached my Senior Sermon in chapel at CBTS and gave my Senior Testimony.  Received my rejection letter from The Southern Baptist Theological Seminary (I was looking to do ThM or PhD work at Southern and was not accepted).  Preached Easter Sunday at FBC International Falls, MN.

May – preached a funeral for a dear friend who passed away;  I finally finished my MDiv degree at CBTS after almost 8 long years.  Preached at Calvary Baptist Church in Cambridge, MN

June – preached at Grace Baptist Church in Cameron, WI

July – took a mini-weekend vacation to Duluth and preached at FBC International Falls, MN.  Celebrated our 6th wedding anniversary.  I was elected to serve as a deacon at Fourth Baptist Church and was also re-appointed to serve on the Missions Committee.

August – preached at Grace Baptist Church, Boyceville, WI – doing pulpit supply for two consecutive Sundays while the Pastor was on vacation.

September – preached at Calvary Baptist Church in Granada, MN (my in-laws home church), elected to serve as Secretary of the CBTS Alumni Association

November – we celebrated Thanksgiving at home this year because my in-laws were getting ready for their “snowbird” journey to Florida for the winter.

December – we were able to go to Florida for a vacation.  Family went ahead of me, they drove down with the in-laws and I flew down on the 2nd of December.  We missed all of the snow and such and we even got to stay an extra day in Florida due to our flight being cancelled.  We celebrated Christmas twice – once in Florida with in-laws and then here at home as a family.

Some other things of interest:

• We both made less money this year than last – significant decrease, God is good in allowing us to give more to our local church than we did in 2009 considering the income decrease for us (over $3500.00 less income than 2009)
• I sent out over 15 resumes in search of full-time pastoral ministry opportunities.  No interviews
• Did a lot of pulpit supply this year (March -Sept) most preaching I have done in a year.  Preached over 22 times in 2010.

Not being in full-time ministry is extremely discouraging and unsettling for us because we are not in a position to put down roots (buy a home, etc.).  It would be foolish of us to start that process here and then have to undo it because of receiving a call somewhere else.  We will continue to pray as we have during the previous year for God’s guidance in this area regarding ministry.

We are excited about 2011 because it is a New Year and we do not know what God has in store for us.

Stats regarding the blog:

We had 2,142 vists to the blog this year, which is less than 2009 which had 2,959 visits.  That is probably due to my writing less this year due to seminary concerns from January – May.

It is also interesting to see the top posts that get the most attention.

The #1 post is my post regarding Dan Conry being fired by Clear Channel (KTLK) back in May of 2008.  That post had 199 views this year.

2 -10 are as follows

My review of Acapulco Restaurant in New Brighton, MN – 124 views

Our post regarding our T-Mobile @ Home phone service – 79 views

The page which tells about the blog  - 72 views

Review of Five Guys in Maple Grove – 69 views

When God turned His back on Jesus – a link to a sermon preached by my friend Donald S. Whitney – 52 views

Review of Salad Creations in Maple Grove – 47 views

My post regarding my rejection to admission at Southern Seminary – 47 views

The right way to resign – regarding the resignation of Philip Graham Ryken from Tenth Presbyterian Church – 44 views

Review of Rojo Mexican Grill in St Louis Park – 36 views.

Thank you for taking time to read, comment, and pray for us!

Merry Christmas to all

Thanks to all who read my posts.  I wanted to take the opportunity to wish you a Merry Christmas.

John 1:14 – And the Word became flesh and dwelt among us, and we beheld His glory, the glory as of the only begotten of the Father, full of grace and truth.(NKJV)

I am sure by now all of the gifts have been exchanged, opened, etc.  Christmas is not necessarily about the gifts, even though we exchange them.  Christmas is about the celebration of the incarnation of the Lord Jesus Christ, who came to this earth, born of a virgin, eventually to die on a Roman cross to pay for the sins of the entire world.  That is the true meaning of Christmas!

If you have any additional questions about the paragraph above, please contact me or leave a comment and I would be glad to talk with you further about the Gospel of Christ.

 

Vacation Wrap-Up

We have actually been home since Monday, but dealing with waves of illness, colds and such.

I joined my family on Thursday, December 2, 2010 in Florida for a vacation.  They drove down to Florida after Thanksgiving and I took the convenient route and flew down.  With all of the hype surrounding the TSA, I was not sure what to expect.  Thankfully, I was surprised and made a point of being extra kind to the TSA agents because they do not have an easy job.  No problems with security and I had plenty of time to wait before my flight left that day.  I made my connection in Atlanta with ease and arrived in Florida on time.

The next day I found myself doing some yard work and raking leaves.  I did not mind doing this, in fact, I miss doing yard work since I live in an apartment.   I enjoyed being able to work outside in short sleeves while the temperature was in the 60′s that day.  I also enjoyed being able to spend time with my nieces and nephews (4 of them) along with my sister in law and brother in law.

My in-laws have a beautiful home and it will suit them well as they stay there during the winter months.  It will probably be hard to come back to MN in the Spring/Summer because this home is so much larger and spacious than the home they have here in MN.  They also have a plethora of orange trees in their backyard which the kids enjoyed eating oranges!

The first Sunday, we visited a church where the music director was an old college friend.  While we enjoyed the sermon, the music was a bit over the top for us.  Much too contemporary for any of us!  Seeing this made me appreciate the conservative music that we have at Fourth Baptist Church.  This trend in contemporary church music is troubling because it takes so much of the world and integrates it in the church through music, etc.    I will not mention the name of the church because my intent is not to impugn them just because I disagree with their musical philosophy.  They are a Bible-believing, Gospel preaching church.

My wife got sick Saturday evening with the stomach virus that I eventually got. She was out of action for a couple of days.

Monday, I had the opportunity of cooking the evening meal for everyone (there were 11 of us total, kids and all) I made a cassoulet recipe that I had previously made here at home and I changed a few things and added shrimp to it.  It turned out to be a hit with the little kids, with my nephew eating two bowls!  There was not much left over when we were done.

Wednesday we went to an aviation museum in the area and Joseph had a lot of fun seeing the various types of aircraft and climbing in the cockpits of several different jets and helicopters.  I knew that I wasn’t feeling well and the stomach virus that hit my wife, hit me hard.  I was down Thursday and part of Friday.  I have not been that sick in years, but during that time, it made me very thankful for the good health that I have had this year.

Saturday, we celebrated Christmas a bit early with the family.  We had a wonderful meal and a great time together.  This will be our first Christmas apart from my in-laws.

The two Saturdays that we were there, I took Joseph to the local Lowes Kids Clinic where we built two train cars (the caboose and the passenger car).  This was a good experience for both of us.  For Joseph, it was good because he learned to follow directions and put something together.  It was good for me to be able to spend some time with him and it was definitely out of my comfort zone because I am not good with building things.  We finished the train yesterday at our local Lowe’s store. The Lowe’s store in Florida could give a few pointers to the stores here in MN on how to run these Kids Clinics.

We ended up coming home a day later because of a flight cancellation on Sunday.  We came home to a great deal of snow on the ground! Even though our flight was cancelled, we were able to go to dinner as a family and enjoyed some really good seafood and some ice cream as well.  My wife and I went to see the spot where we were engaged 7 years ago.

Overall, we had a great time in Florida, and it made me appreciate the time with family. The weather was warmer than here in MN, but unusually cold for this time of the year.  I also had some time to reflect and think regarding the future and ministry.  Still not sure where we will end up or what we will do!

While we were away, I did receive an email from the First Baptist Church of International Falls, MN, letting me know that they called a classmate of mine, Ted Clarke, to be their next pastor and he has accepted.  I had the opportunity to preach at FBC Intl Falls in the Spring and Summer this year.  I am very thankful to have had the opportunity to preach/teach there during their search for a pastor.  I am thankful that Ted Clarke will be the next pastor and I am confident that the Lord will bless his ministry there!

We are praying that we will all get over the colds that we seem to have brought back with us.  We have spent the last week getting caught up from being away. I was able to work some overtime.

This week, we will be getting ready for the Christmas holidays and before we know it, a New Year (2011) will be upon us.

Thanks for reading… comments are welcome as always.

 

 

A Gospel Conversation

Here is a recap of a conversation I had with my son Joseph (4 yrs old) earlier today while we were out running errands.

Joseph:  Dad, what do I have to do to be baptized

Me:  You have to be a Christian

Joseph:  What does that mean?

Me:  You have to believe that Christ died for your sins, was buried, rose again and you have to realize that you ar  a sinner and you cannot do anything about your sin problem. You have to trust in Jesus Christ.  That is the Gospel.

Joseph:  Dad, I believe the Gospel, but I am not a sinner.

Joseph is learning, God is working in his life.  Please continue to pray for his salvation.  He is asking some very good questions in some of our conversations.

It’s not who you are…

but who you know!

I had an insightful conversation with my Dad earlier this week.  He asked me how things were going in my ministry search and I told him ok.  I told him that I had mailed my resume to a prospective church earlier last week and that I found out that I was one among 100 others who mailed their resumes also.  He reminded me about the power of a personal reference.  He told me about several jobs that he obtained because he received a favorable reference from someone else.  He told me that back in the 1960′s and 1970′s how these references helped him advance in his career field (My dad is a PGA Golf Professional).  He also reminded me how he was able to use his influence to help others.  He said that he received calls from time to time to help other people in their career endeavors.

My dad brought up a great principle!  I may not be connected to many people who might be able to help me in ministry, but I do know the King of Kings and the Lord of Lords!  I still believe that God can use people in accomplishing his ultimate purpose!

Bible and a Bear and a few other things…

On Sunday, I had the opportunity to provide pulpit supply at Grace Baptist Church in Cameron, WI which is about a 2 hour drive from the Twin Cities.  The pastor was out of town and needed someone to fill in while he was away.  This was a unique Sunday because Cameron was celebrating Camerama days and there was a parade scheduled for noon on Sunday.  Grace Baptist Church had been working on a float for the parade that day.  Since the parade was to start at noon, the pastor asked me to come speak at their 9:30 am worship service and they would not have Sunday School.

This was a unique experience because I was able to go to another place that I have never been before.  Hwy 8 is a two lane road that runs from I-35 into Wisconsin passing through towns like Chisago City, Lindstrom, Taylors Falls, etc.  The drive is a bit hilly in spots and there are a lot of speed limit changes once you are in WI.

I arrived a bit early and was able to meet John and Karen Thomas and their son Daniel, who were getting things ready for the service.  Once the service started and we sang several hymns, had prayer and took up the offering, it was time for me to preach.  I preached from 1 Peter 1:13-21 with the theme of Living a Holy Life before God.  I spoke for about 30 mins. and then the service was dismissed.  They had a potluck lunch at the church.  Normally, I would attend, but since they had a parade to get ready for and I was so close to home, I politely declined and thanked them for the opportunity to minister there and headed back to the Twin Cities to be with my family for lunch.

Just outside of Cameron, I had an interesting experience.  While I was listening to my pastor (Matt Morrell) preach to the congregation at Fourth Baptist Church (via WCTS AM 1030).  I was on Hwy 8 just before Barron and I noticed a police SUV on my side of the Hwy.  I slowed down because I noticed the traffic on the other side stopped, but there was no direction being provided by the officer on the scene.  I was unsure what was going on.  I saw the officer come back to his vehicle and retrieve a shotgun.  He then proceeded to shoot in front of his vehicle.  This was a bit scary because I did not know what prompted him to shoot or what was he shooting at.  I thought it was a routine traffic stop but I could not see a car.  He fired one shot, then placed his gun back in his vehicle.  Still no direction from him, but I saw the other traffic moving on the opposite side of the Hwy.  I slowly inched by, not knowing what was on the other side of the police SUV.  When I reached the front bumper, I saw the cause for the commotion, there was a large (now dead) black bear on the side of the road.  Not sure of the circumstances, but when I saw the shotgun and the shot being fired… now it all made sense.  As I passed the scene, I was thankful that no one was hurt and that my son was not with me.  He would have been a bit scared of the situation and he would have been asking a million questions about it also.

I made it home around  1 PM and enjoyed lunch with my family and recounted the story above to them.  You never know what you will encounter when you travel!

Next on the docket:  July 11th,  I will be speaking at the First Baptist Church of International Falls, MN for all services (Sunday School, AM and afternoon services).  I have already begun my preparations for this speaking engagement.  The afternoon service sermon is already completed.  I am finishing the Sunday School lesson and AM Sermon.  I am enjoying my experiment with preaching from one book – 1 Peter.  My only regret was that I had not done this sooner.  Most of the time when I was providing pulpit supply or preaching, I usually fretted about what to preach.  I will not recount my previous post on the subject, but the experiment is going well!  I am looking forward to being back at FBC International Falls.  We had a wonderful time there when we were with them over Easter.  Instead of driving up on Saturday (a  6 hour – 300 mile journey), we are going to split the journey up.  We will leave Friday and head for the Duluth area to spend time with one of our dear friends who lives in the area.  We will be there Friday and Saturday, hoping to enjoy a nice dinner at Black Woods Restaurant and maybe an ice cream or shake at the Portland Malt Shoppe.   Sunday we will have an early departure from Duluth (around 6 AM) in order to arrive at FBC in time for the Sunday School Hour.

I am still looking, praying and searching for potential full-time ministry opportunities.  I have several websites that I check daily, weekly and honestly for those of us who are not either trained in music or youth ministry, there is not much out there for full-time vocational ministry.  It is somewhat discouraging, but I remind myself often, that God is in control and that He is sovereign!  If you know of any opportunities, please feel free to leave a comment and let me know.  Many of the good opportunities are never posted, but rather are word-of-mouth referrals.

Thanks for reading and commenting!