Does it pay to work hard anymore?

Today, I received my pay stub for Friday which is our payday.  Our quarterly incentive bonus was paid on this check.  Let me start out by saying that I am thankful to my employer for paying out this bonus every quarter if we meet certain expectations.

What upsets me is that I paid an unbelievable amount in taxes because of the Federal Government feels that they are entitled to take an additional portion of my money because I did well (could we call it a tax on prosperity?) They withhold at 28% on any residual income (bonuses, etc).  Then withholding is taken for Medicare and Social Security.  Last but not least in my case, the State of Minnesota took $115.00.

Please understand that I am not against paying taxes. I believe that every citizen should pay taxes and the Bible reinforces this in several places as well.

What bothers me is that I worked hard for the bonus that I received only to watch the various Government entities take more taxes than usual and leave me with less money.

The Fair Tax is looking much more attractive right now…

Do you think the Government penalizes people for working hard (earning bonuses, etc.)?

Tax Time – Numbers, Numbers, and more Numbers

I am glad that my taxes have been done for sometime and that we have already received our refunds and unfortunately they have been spent (on good things like education and debt reduction.)

I noticed that the White House released the President and Vice-Presidents tax returns.  I took a moment to scan the returns and noticed something very interesting.  I noticed that the President gave over $172,000 to charity which is about 22.5% of his income and the Vice-President gave $5,500 to charity which is less than 5%.  Even though I disagree with our President in many areas, I am thankful that he seems to have a pre-disposition to give generously to charities (I may not agree with what he supports, but he seems to give generously).

What can we learn from this?  What is important to us, will be reflected in what   and how we spend our money and what and how much we give away.  If we say God is important to us, then does our checkbook reflect this priority? I am not getting into the tithing debate in this post, but want to challenge each reader to give generously!

Trying to solve a Catch-22

Here is my dilemma or Catch-22:

I have been searching for a full-time vocational ministry position upon completing my graduate education in 2010.  I have been searching since January of 2010. Recently, a pulpit committee from a church in the Eastern US contacted me and sent me a questionnaire.  I completed the questionnaire and submitted it along with several other pieces of pertinent information.  I received an email back from them after a month that I am no longer being considered a candidate for Senior Pastor.  This did not surprise me because I have been rejected 33 times since January of 2010 for various ministry positions, not just senior pastorates.  I have always wondered what the specific reasons for rejection were.  I have asked and all of the committees have refused to answer this question, except for the one that I just heard from on Monday.

I will summarize the response:

They gave me high marks for being a servant, but said that my background had too much on administration and that there was lack of experience.

I never thought that administrative gifts would be a liability, but that is not the dilemma. Ultimately, I am being rejected or denied opportunities, because I do not have experience. It is true that I do not have any paid, official experience as a pastor. I have served as a pastoral intern, and have served in a wide variety of roles within three different local churches since 1987.  None of them have been paid, official positions.  I currently serve as a deacon in the local church I am a member of now.

The big question is:   How do I ever get experience, if no one is willing to give me a chance to gain the needed/necessary experience?

I have had many good people say, “Go out and start something”  I would, but I know my gifts and abilities and that is not how God has gifted me.  I would not thrive in that environment. I know a college professor who tried to start a church and he was not wired in that way and the church never got off the ground.  He is now in an area where he is thriving and doing well because he is working within his gifts and abilities.

I look forward to hearing from you.

 

Difference Maker: John Piper

Recently, I have been reading the Festschrift for John Piper entitled For The Fame of God’s Name – Essays in Honor of John Piper, edited by Sam Storms and Justin Taylor.  While reading this book I came across a couple of different stories that go along with the theme that I have written about in the past, people who make a difference in the lives of others by asking them a question that changes their life, giving them opportunities to serve, etc.  My desire is to share these stories to be an encouragement to others who may be searching and also to say thanks to those who have been a difference-maker in the lives of others.  I have written about Thabiti Anyabwile and how Mark Dever made a difference in his life (not sure if either of them will read that article) and writing this one about John Piper (not sure if he will see this either).

The first story comes from Jon Bloom who is the President of Desiring God, he writes:

In 1991, about a thousand people were attending Bethlehem.  Pam and I didn’t know the Pipers personally.  So a phone call in January caught me off guard.  It was Noël Piper. “Johnny and I would like to know if you and Pam would be interested in renting our basement apartment.” I think my jaw dropped to the floor.

In the spring of 1993, as we were preparing to move out of the Pipers’ house into our first little home, I heard from Jim that John was contemplating hiring his first full-time administrative assistant.  He wanted a male, someone who could travel with him and uniquely care for the growing number of inquiries and ministry demands.  This news landed on me with the same weighty sense I had about the apartment.  I couldn’t get it out of my mind.  At age twenty-seven, an administrative assistant position may have appeared an unwise career choice.  But I knew I was supposed to do it.  This was the next step.  A few days later I walked upstairs to John’s home office and simply asked him to consider me for the job.  He did.  I began in July.(Pg. 502)

What a story!  I am not sure that I would have the boldness to ask for a job like Jon Bloom did, but now he is the President of Desiring God.  But it all began with a simple question regarding the rental of a basement apartment which eventually forged a friendship and relationship which has grown and been nurtured over these many years and still continues to thrive today.   In my own world, I have sent unsolicited resumes for opportunities that I was aware of that I was interested in, but I did not receive those positions.  The difference was the fact that I did not have a close enough relationship with the person making the hiring decision to warrant consideration.

The second story comes from Tom Steller.  Tom is the Academic Dean at Bethlehem College and Seminary. He writes:

As much as Dr. Piper loved investing in college students, his growing desire to preach to all ages in all situations in life the glories of Christ that he was seeing in his study and in the classroom became overwhelming.  A short while later, we received another letter from Dr. Piper, saying that Bethlehem Baptist Church in downtown Minneapolis called him to serve as their pastor.  The next sentence changed my life forever.  ”Would you like to come and serve with me?”

There is a bit of a back story that I did not include in the above quote that I think will give some context to the overall story.  Tom was a student of John Piper’s at Bethel College and had taken seven classes from him.  He also attended Fuller Seminary because of John Piper’s influence.  Tom was the one who founded The Bethlehem Institute which eventually morphed into Bethlehem College and Seminary.

Again another great story of someone making a different in the life of another person by asking a simple question.  I like what Tom Steller said before disclosing the question that John Piper had asked him, “The next sentence changed my life forever”.  As I sit here and write this post, I think about what that would be like to get a phone call, email, or have a personal conversation with someone that had the ability to put another person in a position that would eventually lead to unparalleled passion and fruitfulness and a great growth potential.  If I received a call from men like John Piper, Albert Mohler, Russell Moore, I would probably fall over in shock!  I have never met John Piper personally. I met Albert Mohler once while on the SBTS campus in 2008, and I have traded a couple of emails with two of Russell Moore’s assistants, never meeting him in person either.

As a side note, I have answered a lot of questions this week regarding not being in ministry from various people (church members and co-workers).  Never an easy question to answer, but one person that I spoke with this week got it.  He said that it sounds like you are in a catch-22, churches refuse to interview or hire you because they say you do not have enough experience, how do they expect you get obtain the needed or necessary experience?  I have had a lot of conversations on the subject of not being in ministry, but this person really understood what was going on.

Who knows, maybe one of these days I will get a call, email with a question like Tom Steller received?  Until then….

Thanks to John Piper for being a difference-maker in the lives of these two men and in the lives of others who have not shared their experience in print.

Last time I checked it was the local church

Recently I have been reading a book that has captured my attention and really helped to mold and change my thinking about the role of the local church in sending men out into ministry.

As you know, I have been praying, looking and searching for a place to serve the Lord in full-time vocational ministry since January of 2010.  Recently, I had the opportunity to pick up a copy of the book Test, train, affirm & send into ministry.  I had the opportunity to speak with the author recently regarding my situation and I had been reading his blog.  I am not writing a book review per se (although I might take on that task at a later date), but I want to share with you some quotations from this book along with my thoughts that will hopefully align your thinking regarding ministry and the local church.

Most of us probably thought that once we completed our training (Bible college or seminary) that it was incumbent upon either of these institutions to place us in ministry.  It seems very logical, but yet it is unscriptural.  ”God has not ultimately commissioned these institutions to fulfill this responsibility” (Croft, pg. 31) Churches have abdicated their responsibilities because of the plethora of institutions that exist to provide training and education for future ministry.  The churches should take the position that they need to partner with these institutions rather than give up what rightly belongs to the church.  I am not against seminaries or colleges, I graduated from two such institutions. What I am against is the local church exempting itself from the testing, training and affirming of men who are called to ministry.  It is easy just to send someone to a Bible college or seminary and hope that they turn out right, but why not take an active approach in that training?

It is the local church that God has appointed to be the agent to test, train, affirm, and send those who are called.  Because of this truth, the local church must embrace this enormous responsibility (Croft, pg. 33)

What does the Bible say about this?  Look at Acts 13:1-3

Now in the church that was at Antioch there were certain prophets and teachers:  Barnabas, Simeon who was called Niger, Lucius of Cyrene, Manaen who had been brought up with Herod the tetrarch, and Saul. As they ministered to the Lord and fasted, the Holy Spirit said, “Now separate to Me Barnabas and Saul for the work to which I have called them.” Then, having fasted and prayed, and laid hands on them, they sent them away. (NKJV)

By reading this passage, we see that the local church was the sending agent and instrument of affirmation of Barnabas and Saul.  The local church cannot shirk away or deny this crucial responsibility.

Here are some quotations that really impacted my thinking in this area:

“No church, therefore, which neglects the proper education of her ministers, can be considered as faithful, either to her own most vital interests, or to the honour of her divine Head and Lord” (Croft, pg. 52)

“Without the proper instruction of God’s Word in the church, not only will those called into ministry be confused and the church lost in its responsibility in the external call, but spiritual life will also be lacking in the church.” (Croft, pg.53)

The situation I am currently in is a bit unique.  I graduated from Bible College in 1992 and was ordained shortly after graduation (If I had it to do over, I would have not been ordained so soon) I spent 7 years in the secular workforce wondering where I would end up.  I ended up at a mission agency for 3.5 years (1999-2002) and then came to seminary in 2002.  I have been a member of the same local church for almost 10 years now.  I currently serve as a deacon.  I cannot go back to the church that ordained me and expect any help because there are some doctrinal and philosophical differences that exist between us.  We have a great and a cordial relationship,  I go back to visit when I can and the people are always kind and gracious.  At the same time, I recognize that there are differences.

In order to test, train, & affirm a man for ministry it requires tangible involvement on the part of the pastors or elders of that particular congregation and the members of that congregation as well.  How will a local church send a man off to ministry if he has not been given opportunities to exhibit his internal calling within that church?

 

Diseased or Disqualified….

I bet the title got your attention…. if it did then I did my job!

Let me say, neither of them…. read on and you will understand.

I was recently speaking with a friend who like myself is trying to find a place to serve in full-time vocational ministry.  He has been a youth pastor in the past but through no-fault of his own, found himself back in the secular workforce.  He recently attended a conference and got together with some other student pastors.  He relayed the experiences to me that he felt like he didn’t belong because he was not a full-time vocational student pastor.  Hearing his story made me remember my own experiences in this area.  I remember graduating from college in 1992 and watching others go off into full-time ministry.  It would be another 7 years before I had my opportunity.  The opportunity that I had was in a para-church organization.  I will summarize my experience by saying, it was not all bad, but a lot of it was not good either.  I left to go to seminary after 3 1/2 years of serving in that area.  Now I am experiencing the same things all over again, graduated from seminary in 2008 and 2010 with two degrees and I can’t get any interviews. So I really could identify with what my friend was telling me that day.

I reminded him (and myself) that we did not do anything wrong.  In his case, he was forced out by a pastor who refused to pay him a livable wage and who eventually wanted someone else as the youth pastor.  I reminded him that neither of us have done anything to disqualify ourselves from being in ministry, that we did not have leprosy (even though people treat us like there is something wrong when they hear our stories) and that the gifts and calling of God are irrevocable (Romans 11:29).  In spite of this, I know of men who have disqualified themselves from ministry due to their own moral failures, but yet have received better treatment than we have in our pursuit of full-time vocational ministry.

Churches and pastors, please do not treat people like they are second-class citizens, if they are called to ministry, but do not find themselves in a full-time position.  If anything, do what you can to affirm the gifts of that individual who may find themselves in your church after their education is complete.  When you are at a conference, do not look down or disdain an individual who you may meet but is not in full-time ministry, but you recognize that they have a desire to be there.  Remember, there is nothing wrong with the desire (1 Timothy 3:1).  Instead of passing judgment on us because of our current circumstances, why not come along side of us and offer to help.  Invite these men into preach in your church, take them to lunch and listen to them.  Be a friend to them.  Nothing stings worse then being treated like a outcast from people within the profession that you are desiring to be in.

In another post, I am going to write about the role of the local church in sending men out into ministry.  But for now, I wanted to speak to the story that grieved me when I heard it a few weeks ago.

What we can learn from Joe Paterno

This is not going to be an article on football or the scandal that plagued Joe Paterno in recent days before his death, but rather a few things that I learned from an article in the USA Today written by Jack Carey.

Most people will remember Joe Paterno for his coaching longevity, his accomplishments on the football field or the scandal that eventually led to his dismissal from Penn State University. What stood out to me was something far different.

Joe Paterno had a mentor who believed in him. This belief was not just something that was said and never acted upon. The individual who mentored Paterno was a coach named Rip Engle. As the story is told in Carey’s article, Paterno had been accepted into law school, but while he was waiting graduation, Paterno was given the opportunity to be a part-time assistant under Engle working with the quarterbacks. Engle was later given the head coaching position at Penn State and was allowed to bring one assistant with him and that assistant was Joe Paterno. Paterno ended up succeeding Engle in 1966 and the rest of the story is history.

The part I am focusing on is that fact that Paterno was given a chance by someone who could help him and did help him succeed! Engle gave Joe Paterno a part time assistant job which ended up preparing him for the job that he held for 46 years. Not much was said in the article about the relationship between Engle and Paterno, but it was that key relationship and mentoring that undoubtedly took place between these two men that helped Joe Paterno become one of the most well-known college football coaches. Not many people know who Rip Engle is, but they know who Joe Paterno is!

If you are mentoring someone, what are you doing to make sure that they are advancing and progressing in their respective fields? Many professions require an internship and it is during those times that the greatest learning takes place because it is leaving the theoretical and the book learning and allowing them to put things into practice with hands-on learning. What good is a doctor, if they complete their classroom training, observe the more experienced doctors practice medicine, but then the student is given menial tasks and never allowed to do anything of substance that would allow him to eventually practice medicine and become a full-fledged doctor? What good is a lawyer that finishes law school and passes the bar exam, but is never allowed to argue a case?

I think that there is a big misunderstanding in mentoring. Mentoring is not just getting together, talking and listening, or just watching some experienced person perform various tasks within a certain field. Mentoring is spending time with people and letting them do some of the same tasks that the mentor would do. Mentoring is about making opportunities for the one being mentored so that they can grow and develop.

Too many times we can place too much stock in education. I am not discounting education in any way. I have a B.A , M.A. in Theology and a Master of Divinity, so I am not against education. I think too much emphasis is placed on education and too little on letting people learn hands on. I would not want a pilot flying a plane, if he hasn’t had the proper amount of classroom training along with time in the flight simulator and the right amount of flying hours. The balance here is education with practical training.

The same is true for pastoral ministry. We have enough people out there that are saying, “Watch what I do and learn from me”, but not enough pastors who are willing to take a risk and let people learn by doing.

I think the words of Mark Dever are so applicable in this context of mentoring,

God raises up young men who watch their life and doctrine closely and are gifted to teach his Word publicly. Hire them when they’re a cub. Let them chew things up around the house for a while, and you’ll have a lion that loves you for life! Young pastors make mistakes. But young pastors—if they’re called and equipped by God—can stay for a long time, and have deeply fruitful ministries for decades

Remember, not many people knew who Rip Engle was but they knew who Joe Paterno was. May we be people who not only mentor others but give others a chance to learn by doing and by making opportunities for them to do so!

Its That Time Of The Year Again

Well, I am on vacation and have been since last week. Besides dealing with the rain, everything has been good thus far. It has been a while since I really had any substantial time off where I could do nothing and get away with it. My wife and I were able to go for a long walk on Monday morning and not have to worry about running to the next thing on our schedule. I just got back from taking my son to lunch, just he and I, no one else and again no time pressure to go do something or be somewhere. We walked about 1.3 miles to and from the restaurant, again no schedule or time pressure to deal with. As I am writing this, I am sitting with my five month old daughter and we are enjoying the nice Florida weather. It is 70 degrees and I am sitting outside in shirtsleeves in December! I could not do this in MN in the winter.

I have been taking time to do a lot of reading that I am unable to do during a normal week/month. I have been reading slowly and deliberately through the Gospel of Mark, instead of trying to read hurriedly. I have been able to read and really think about what is being said contextually, but looking at the meaning of some of the words that catch my attention. I noticed in Mark 1 the word immediately is used often in referring to the manner in which people followed Jesus when He called them. The KJV uses the term straightway, which is also a good term. I am also reading some e-books that I have downloaded in recent weeks. One of the titles that I am reading is Randy Alcorn’s Money and Possessions, this is a recently revised edition that was available for free on the Kindle (for me, the Kindle app). I look forward to seeing how many e-books I can read before my vacation ends in early January!

From the family corner, we welcomed our daughter into the world five weeks early in July(one day before our 7th wedding anniversary). It is a blessing to be a parent! My son is doing well in Kindergarten and is learning how to read. I am enjoying listening to him sound out words and reading small sentences. My wife is staying busy managing things on the home front as well as working a part time job from our home.

From the ministry perspective this year has been a different one. I have not preached since September 2010. Not exactly sure why this has transpired. I have also not been able to teach in a formal setting either. I would be lying if I did not say that this was difficult, but I also have to remember that for reasons unbeknown to me that if nothing changes between now and December 31, that this is the will of God for me. I am wondering when I am asked to preach, if I will forget how to since it has been so long since the last opportunity. Part of me questions if I have done something wrong in my life to come from the year 2010 which was full to overflowing with a large number of preaching and teaching opportunities, to 2011 in which the opportunities were non-existent. Nothing has changed in the search for a pastoral ministry opportunity. I have not sent out any resumes in quite some time because the opportunities do not exist. I am quite active in my local church, but there’s a large tension there because I currently work a secular job that takes up 45-50 hours a week and I have a family that also needs my attention and time. I then try to do what I can in the area of church ministry, but feel quite inadequate because I am not able to devote more time to it and then the tension exists between my full time job and the desire that
God has placed in my heart for full time ministry (1 Timothy 3:1). It would be nice to be able to replace the secular job with a full time ministry opportunity. Recently, I have been told by a couple of well-meaning individuals that I should just stop looking for a place of full time pastoral ministry and just pour myself into my secular job and be a good layman. I understand what they are saying but I do not necessarily agree with it. Why would God allow me to go to Bible College and graduate? Then after seven years in a secular job, allow me to serve in full-time vocational ministry for three and one half years in a difficult situation that taught me a lot about how ministry was not supposed to be done. Then God provided an opportunity to attend seminary exactly ten years after I had graduated from college. It took me eight years to complete two degrees (M.A. in Theology/Biblical studies and an MDiv degree). I may be wrong but I do not think that God would call me into the ministry, allow me to complete my undergraduate and graduate education and then leave me hanging. I could be wrong, but I do not think so. There are plenty of people who serve in local churches with no aspiration or desire for full time pastoral ministry. I often wonder how many men are out there who are in the same position that I am in, all done with their education and no place to go? I have seen men looking for ministry positions, get so entrenched in their secular jobs that when the time comes for full time ministry, they never make the transition because they have been disillusioned along the way.

I apologize for being so reflective, but it usually seems to happen naturally this time of year since we are ten days away from a new year. I am not one to make resolutions because I do not like to over promise and under deliver. I do not know what 2012 will bring. I pray that I will love God more than I have, that I will love my wife and my children more, and that God will grant me greater opportunities to serve Him that I did not have in 2011.

Thank you for reading and I do appreciate your comments (not the spam)

Office, anyone?

I think I am in need of an office.  You might say that is a tall order or why would you need an office.  Let me explain..

I have been working for the better part of 20 years.  In all of my work history, I have been privileged to work for three different employers.  The first employer I worked for in Jacksonville, FL was while I was in college.  When I first started there, I did not have a desk or a cubicle, but then changed jobs and I had a place in the “cube farm” near a window, which was great.  I kept that job for eight years, when the Lord graciously opened up an opportunity for me to serve in full-time vocational ministry in administration at a Baptist mission agency also in Jacksonville, FL.  This was a step-up and with the job came a nice office that also had a window.  Although I did not spend much time in the office because I stayed quite busy, it was nice to have a place that was mine.  I had a desk and a credenza and was able to make it look nice.  During my tenure, we relocated and I had another office in the back of a warehouse type building.  This “office” was not the greatest.  It was hot in the summer and it did not have a window. It was adequate, but again, it was a place that I used to work and think.  I left there to go to seminary in the Twin Cities.  When I moved, I gave up my “office” and realized that if I ever had one again that it would be a while.  My books went into boxes and tubs and only kept the ones that I needed to use for seminary, etc.  When I was single, my “office” was in my living room, bookshelves, desk, etc.  It worked for a while.  Then when I got married and we moved into a larger apartment, then I was able to secure the 2nd bedroom for a quasi-office (it was also a guest room).  I had my desk and some of my books, the rest were in storage. I could go there early in the morning or late at night to study, think, read, meditate, etc. without disturbing anyone. We had our first child in 2006 and shortly thereafter had to move to a bigger place.  This place was bigger in square footage, but I lost my office space again.  My son needed a room and therefore due to space constraints, my desk, file cabinet and bookcase have resided in our bedroom in one corner for the last 5 years or so.  My wife has been patient, but has expressed on different occasions that she wished there was somewhere I could move my desk, file cabinet, bookcase, etc.  I agreed with her, but said that would not be possible unless I was able to find a job that came with an office.  I have worked for the same company since I arrived in the Twin Cities nine years ago. I am a cube dweller, with no window.  I am thankful to have a job – office or not.

The other day, I was thinking how nice it would be to get my desk, file cabinet, books out of our bedroom and have a place for them away from our apartment.  As I write this post in the living room, I am sitting next to another bookcase that is filled with a majority of my books (overflowing).

Not only does an office provide space for such things as desks, file cabinets, and books. It provides someone a place to call their own, a place to think, ponder, meditate and brainstorm.  A place where one can close the door and commune with God.  A place where one can read and write.

I was able to do a fair amount of studying at my desk in my corner of our bedroom.  Now that I am finished with seminary, I do not spend as much time at the desk as I did.  Mostly because it is overrun with paper and I try to organize it only to find myself buried in it again.  My work desk is neat mainly because there is very little paper involved in my current line of work (all electronic via email). Having two children does not lend itself to having a place to go for quiet reflection in our apartment.

There are others who are able to study in places like Panera Bread or Starbucks.  I have always envied these folks and wondered how they could do it with people coming and going, the noise factor, etc.  I like to have it somewhat quiet, but not pin-drop, library quiet.

Maybe someday I will be able to own a home where I can create an office space or I find employment or better yet return to full-time vocational ministry that would afford me office space.  Then I would be able to relocate the desk, books, file cabinet, etc.  For now, I will live with it in the corner and hopefully one of these days, be able to fully tackle the organization of my desk and hopefully not be buried alive by paper while in the process of trying to go paperless and waiting to see if the Lord will allow me this small request to get these office things out of our apartment sometime soon!  I know my wife would be extremely happy when that day arrives and she would probably be very glad to help me load the desk, file cabinet, books and bookcases and gladly watch them depart.

Until then, we wait…..

(yes, we are still looking for a full-time pastoral ministry opportunity – Jan 2012 will mark two years in our present search)

Phrases that need to be banished

Recently, I have received a few rejection letters and they all contain phrases that need to be banished – never to be used again

I have archived your email with your qualifications and ministry resume should any openings come up in the future.

Translation:  I have either filed your email somewhere never to be found again or I have deleted it off my computer.  I have no intentions of ever contacting you again, but I did not want to be so blunt.

I have seen similar phrases in a secular job environment where they promise to keep your resume on file and contact you if any openings in your skill set are available.

One question – Has anyone ever sent their resume somewhere for consideration and then you were rejected and told the same thing?  Has anyone ever been contacted after the initial contact?

Like Jon Acuff has said – Stop saying polite lies!

Another one is the word “whatever”  - Now this one I have used before, but the more I hear it, the more distasteful and disrespectful it sounds.  It is almost like people use it in order to silence their opponent, kind of like a smart bomb in a video game that blows everything up.  So when you here that, it is almost as if you cannot reply to what was previously said.

“It is what it is” – this one makes no sense at all.  I hear it all the time in the workplace.  It is another one of those phrases that I would love to see become extinct quickly.  It is a cheap way of saying that you cannot change anything and rather than try you will give up and this phrase seems to be some sort of affirmation of that fact.

One term that drives me nuts – supper.  It sounds whimpy… Where I came from – lunch was the noon meal and dinner was the evening meal.  Supper just sounds so wimpy.  This is another word that I would love to see disappear from the vocabulary of many…

Just my thoughts here on a Friday evening and I welcome yours in the comments (except for spam)